If you have a bad relationship with your MIL ....?

how do you handle it without it being a strain on your marriage and her relationship with your children if you want to cut off the relationship w/ her ?

Basically, I have bit my tongue and tried to give my MIL the benefit of the doubt But, now I'm at my wits end and don't know what to do ? First off, shes not all with it, she has issues w/ hard prescription drugs and alcoholism. This causes so many problems and to top it off my FIL and their three sons (including my hubby ) run circles around her problems for years and nothing ever gets dealt with B/c she wont get help So, her immature behavior is basically ignored and It leaves me very frustrated.

I use to never reprimand her when she would get out of line b/c i was uncomfortable w/ practically babysitting a 52 yr old woman. Anyway, she was in town visiting in Feb and we had a falling out b/c she was disturbing my household at 11pm at nite waking my son up and i put her in her place for the first time...and her crazy asss didn't like that ..

So She then went back home and was talking shitt about me and telling their side of the family how horrible i was treating her and I made her sleep on the floor and was telling people that i cheat on her son ......just lies on top of more lies b/c she loves to play the victim role and wont take accountability for her immaturity / problems ......so anyway I'm done with her and her crap. I dont want her staying in my home when she visits chicago , i dont want to be alone with her b/c shes too much drama .......I have already told my husband this stuff , he understands i guess But, her and my FIL are visiting in May.......for our sons b-day, is it ok /my place to demand they dont stay in our house , they have to book hotels ??



i haven't spoken to MIL since our fall out 3 weeks ago should i call her and lay it all out that i don't appreciate her lies and twists in stories or should my hubby just transfer the message that I don't want anything to do w/ her ???

please i need advice ? I'm very aware that i will be segregating myself from my husbands family, I think i'm okay w/ that , i just dont know what that does to my son and husband in the long run ?If you have a bad relationship with your MIL ....?
Im not my MIL's biggest fan either..........Im FAR from it. Although you have every right to tell her off for saying all of that crap about you, she needs to hear if from your husband! he needs to step up and tell her straight forward and not in a nice way ';Look back off. she is my wife and if you cant learn to respect her, then why should we treat you with respect'; and to me, no matter how close your husband is to his mom, you and him are family now, you guys are a team. If she wants to mess with you, then she is also messing with him. Ive learned from experience that she needs to hear it from her son, not from you. If you tell her anything, shes gonna smile with the thought that she actually got to you. if he tells her, she might realize that you come first, not her. as far as your son, you dont need to have a relationship with her for your son to. I dont give a s*** about my MIL, but i love my son to death, so for his sake, if she wants to come see him, thats fine, but dont bother talking to me. I also dont let my son catch on to the fact that me and his grandma dont care for eachother. Just try to let her into his life for his sake, NOT HERS!If you have a bad relationship with your MIL ....?
I am having the same problem. One night my FMIL blew up during a rational level headed conversation and said ';Would you just like me out of your life, that would be easier wouldn't it'; All because we told her that she needs to get the phone out of our future home- his dad is renting us their old home and she is having attatchment issues.



The best thing to do is to suggest counseling for the three of you to go together. Talk to your fiance and tell him it is time for him to step in. It is his mom and he needs to stand up and be a man and let her know that you are going to be his wife and that means that you come first to him and she needs to back off.



Good luck, I never thought the ';monster in law'; jokes were for real. I always thought that was just people joking. Apparently not.